Bitter about batter

I've had a craving for brownies. Big time. And not the wig-triggity pilsbury box kind; the kind you make from scratch where you melt the best quality chocolate in a double broiler with real butter. The kind that the mother and maid from "Meet Me in St. Louis" or the old hens from "Pollyanna" made. The kind that takes about six months to walk off, walking 10 miles a day.

I did some research online and found a recipe for 'low carb brownies' and thought- yes really thought that I could create the ultimate brownie without all the extra calories. Trust me, it sounded good - the recipe called for butter and baking chocolate (to melt down) - and for splenda, which is the sugar substitute we use and like. The ingredient I wasn't familiar with is soy flour. No problem, right. Flour is flour. Wrong.

The thing is, once I mixed the batter, I, like any good good, tasted it.

YUCK.

I poured the batter into the pan. I baked the brownies. I made the low-carb frosting. (decent). I cooled the brownies after taking them out of the oven. I tasted them again.

YUCK.

I felt like that crazy old woman down the street who feeds he children tofu with soy milk for breakfast and whose house smells like cat litter and cinnamon. Even Jack wouldn't finish a brownie. Ed said he thought they were okay. Okay like sardines out of a can.

I'm pissed. Oh, well. Good thing we had a back up wig-triggity Pilsbury box in the pantry. That should only take about three months to walk off. That is, if I only eat half the pan.

The great thing in all of this is that Jack is fine. Two nights ago he threw up and has been fighting some weird virus. (could be fifths or sixths desease - don't ask, he's fine). For the first time in his life, Ed & I realized just how much we take Jack's health for granted. And, to be healthy means fostering a healthy attitude about good baking. Not fake, bitter batter baking.